It is hard to be agnostic, because the people I know who are firm believers in God can easily accept and believe simple advice like: "Don't worry! God has better plans for you." or "Let go and let God."
I find it really annoying when people, especially my classmates tell me those things. They do not understand because they are clueless about my faith. I cannot solve my problems by relying it all on a heavenly body that might not even exist.
It is hard to comfort me, it is hard to convince me that things are okay because I know they are not. Saying words like "It's okay, this will pass." or "I understand what you feel." will not make me think it's okay, or make me feel understood. I have very high comfort standards. (Haha! What?) So here are a few things that might etch a smile on my face when I'm down:
1. Whisk me away. I don't fucking care where you take me, just whisk me away from where I am crying, or where I am thinking about my problems. Bring me to a park, to a market, whatever, and talk to me there. Talk about anything, you don't have to talk about my problems, you just have to talk to me like nothing's wrong. And when you think I'm emotionally stable and ready to speak, ask me what's wrong and I'll talk, and you'll keep quiet and you'll listen.
2. Leave me alone. Wait for me to cool down, then sit next to me and hug me, then wait for me to talk. I'll tell you my problems when I trust you enough. When I know you're not going to judge me. When I know you're going to listen no matter how whiny I am or how shallow my problem is.
3. Sit beside me, pick up a book, any book, and open it, read whatever's written there in a funny voice. And I'll laugh.
4. And this is my favorite, one of my classmates did this to me already and it's perfect. He stood beside me and said "Fuck, Regina, stop crying already." and I ignored him. He pulled out his handkerchief, wiped my eyes and my nose and said: "There you go!You look so much better." But the tears kept falling, the snot kept dripping and he said "Regina I am going to kill you if you don't stop crying!" Then wiped my face again. I smiled to make him stop and he said in a gentle voice, "Just stop crying, okay? I hate seeing you cry." It was perfect. It may not be much but he wasn't like my other classmates who just went up to me and said "Aw, Regina it's okay. Stop crying.".