Improbable Things That I Am Dying To Accomplish: (Part 1)

1. Go to college outside the Philippines.
I know that it seems like I am aiming too high, but I am seriously considering it. I have already discussed about it with my parents, and they seem to like the idea of me going to college in another country. I know going to college and living alone is a complicated thing to do especially in a foreign place, but I think I'm ready. I am willing to take the risk. Now all I need are exceptional study habits, leadership skills and above average grades, and I'm good to go.
2. Have a movie night with five people I love.
Okay, I know it's a shallow thing but all I really want is to experience all the simple pleasures in life. I want to curl up in a bed full of soft blankets and pillows, turn the Air conditioning on, rent/buy some DVDs and open a shitload pack of chips and pour it on a giant bowl. Then we turn off the lights, eat and have intellectual conversations and forget all about the movie. Then we stay up late, or don't sleep at all and play Alaska's "Best Day, Worst Day" game and it will be beautiful. And I would be happy.
3. I want to be the first choice for once.
All my life, I have been the second choice, the second option. I hate being second to the person I put first. Even when it comes to my best friend, I know she will choose her boyfriend over me.  There is always someone better than me, someone who will hog all the attention from the person I care about. And the person I care about will not even notice that I get jealous or lonely when he or she spends time with another person, because I don't show my emotions. I pretend like it's nothing to me when it affects me a lot. I want someone who will sit lazily on a Saturday night and think, "Shit, I want to hang out with Regina." but things like those never happen. Because people never want to hang out with me. Because there is someone prettier, someone better, someone more charming and less annoying. And I am really sick of it.